It is truly a beautiful struggle, being saved from the darkness in this world.
I am redeemed from my sins, I am forgiven for the mistakes I have made, I am a new creation in Christ, and I am guaranteed a spot up above in the good ol’ throne room.
These things are worthy of rejoicing and praise, most definitely. There is just one thing I cannot seem to make peace with – watching those who are not in the same redeemed place as me struggle in the storms of this life.
I know very well that we are to expect struggle and hardships in this life, but it is a completely different thing when I am in my lifeboat while I watch broken ones drown in the rocky seas around me, especially if it is family.
It is almost like taking your heart, and shredding it into tiny little pieces, hoping that they can make a life raft out of it.
I can’t tell you how many times I have prayed, Lord, give them my place, I am ready to trade! This pain is unbearable.
I don’t know if you have any similar situations but this has got to be my hardest life season thus far in my twenty three years on earth.
I don’t know why the Lord has me where He has me, but I have to hold tight to the fact that there is a reason, and that there is a purpose.
When people say, “how is there a God when children die everyday of starvation?”, or “how is there a God when there are children who are being raped every day, and nothing is being done about it?”, I can tell you that I am at a similar place right now in my walk with the Lord.
Allow me to be transparent and vulnerable here.
How can the Lord allow such things to happen? How is this so? How am I to watch this?
The answer is this: I will not.
If you have been following this blog for any amount of time, you will know that I am compelled. I am compelled to move, I cannot sit still, I cannot keep closed, I cannot keep shut. There is too much darkness in this world for one to “hope someone else will do it”.
Far. too. much. darkness.
If I sat still, if I hoped for someone else to step in, they would drown, they would die in the darkness of this world.
What if it was your little sister?
What if it was your niece?
What if it was your older brother?
What if it was your mother, or your father?
Or what if it was all of them, plus another 100 million people that you don’t know?
Would you be compelled to move then?
Let me be clear, we are His hands. We are His feet. We have His Holy Spirit within us to move, to reach. We are able.
There are natural, organic ways to reach the broken. Many people don’t move because they think they are too small, too ordinary to do anything. Friends, this is a lie straight from down under (you know what I mean, not Australia, the other one). If you have any doubts about this fact, any questions or concerns of how you can do this, please reach out to me.
The Lord has a plan, even when I doubt Him. The Lord has a plan, even when I am angry with Him. The Lord has a plan, even when I couldn’t possibly understand.
My place is not to understand.
My place is to move.